Hey Microwave Mom, It’s Going to be OK

Many years ago, I worked with a woman who called herself a “microwave mom”. How sad! I thought. Her poor kid needs a real meal! Then a weird thing happened. I had a kid.

In those blissful days of pregnancy, I swore my child would never eat McDonald’s regularly and would have a balanced, organic meal 3 times a day.

Yeah, that didn’t really pan out.

I do try to not go overboard with the fast food. I do try to feed him organic stuff when I can. But I also don’t beat myself up that his favorite and most requested dish is Tyson chicken nuggets.

All of this is on my mind because I’ve been working on a review of Magnolia Table cookbook which I will post here this week. In reading some reviews of the book, I’ve been somewhat taken aback by how mean people can be about what other people choose to eat or not eat. As I will discuss in my review, Magnolia uses some processed foods. And there are people who are not OK with that. At all. And I get that. To be honest, I gave up using condensed soups a few years ago and generally avoid a recipe that requires it. But that’s my prerogative. It doesn’t have to be yours and I’m not going to judge you for putting Cream of Mushroom in your casserole.

What has me on my soapbox is not the ire directed at Joanna Gaines; let’s face it, she’s laughing all the way to the bank. It’s the snark toward the people cooking her recipes. One commenter stated something like “They are so proud of themselves…” meaning that her recipes are so simple any nitwit can make them.

In this hectic world, shouldn’t we be a little proud if we cook anything at all?

I grew up in the 80s where processed food ruled. I can sing the Hamburger Helper and the Rice A Roni jingles for you. I started cooking as a teenager by preparing dinner for my mom and me. My dad worked second shift and it was just the two of us. I’d start dinner and it was almost always based on some convenience foods: a simple stir fry with Rice A Roni, spaghetti with jarred sauce and frozen garlic bread, and yes, even Hamburger Helper. This is how I learned to cook and it grew my confidence to try actual made-from-scratch recipes. And honestly, it was tasty.

When I was in college, I came home for Christmas break and was determined to make a cake that was on the cover of Southern Living’s annual cookbook. It was somewhat involved in that it was a layer cake with a custard filling and whipped frosting. I was trucking along until I noticed that I hadn’t read the recipe carefully and was supposed to separate out the eggs and save the yolks for the custard. I ended up pitching my batter in the creek behind the house (the joys of ruling living! ) and starting all over. I never told my mom and she never said a word that I’m sure she wondered why her egg supply diminished so rapidly. I later confessed my mishap to my grandmother and she said “Well honey, why didn’t you use a boxed mix for the cake and just make the filling and frosting from scratch?”

I found this so ironic because my grandmother spent the majority of her life making everything from scratch. For much of her life, if she wanted to fix chicken for dinner, she went out in the barnyard and wrung a chicken’s neck to make this happen. I was somewhat shocked that she’d suggest I cut a corner.

But years laters it makes sense. She wrung the chicken’s neck because she had no choice. She make the cakes from scratch because she had to. When given a choice later in life, she choose to make life a little easier and use cake mix. And Bisquick to make biscuits and dumpling dough. And other timesaving products that modern foodies roll their eyes at. Somehow we’ve gone from embracing the Hamburger Helper helping hand to believing we should be butchering our own beef and rolling out our own pasta, and thinking we are failures if we don’t. We’ve gone from celebrating the simple recipes, the Cake Mix Doctor, the “semi-homemade” approach to scorning anything less than 100% made-from-scratch.

I’m a big believer that homemade is best. Fresh is best. But sometimes we don’t have time for the best. And we have to settle for good. And that’s ok. It’s what has us buying slow cookers, and pressure cookers and air fryers…the need for speed and ease to get a meal on the table that we can feel somewhat good about. We are trying. We should be proud of that.

I was chatting about meal planning one day with two beloved friends and colleagues of mine. Both are professional women with demanding jobs and kids to feed. One of them shared her weekly meal plan with us and said “It’s not as wholesome as I’d like but it keeps us from eating dinner from the Circle K hot dog wheel.”

I cut more corners in the kitchen than I’d like especially on week nights. But you know what? My son is always super excited when I say dinner is ready. My husband says hearing my click the stove off is the best sound of the day. And we sit down together and have dinner whether it’s hot dogs with chili from a can or something made from scratch.

So let me tell you this momma (or dads!), whatever you’re doing, it’s ok. Fix that Hamburger Helper. Roll out the pasta if you have time. Be proud of whatever you are doing. Put it on Instagram and tag me and I’ll cheer for you. Because at the end of the day, it’s the time you spend at the table that matters, not the time at the stove. It’s the fact that you’re trying that matters.

And if you have to stop at the Circle K now and then for a hot dog, well that’s ok too.

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